You want a Men’s Day, Go ahead

March 9, 2012 § 3 Comments

Every second day, there is at least one post on facebook disparaging women, usually in form of jokes. Some are funny, some are not. But always there, in your face. Then on International Women’s Day, the number of such posts multiplies. There are few about how there is no men’s day or some way of saying men have it worse. It pisses me off. Yes, it’s a joke. I get it. But do you get it? It’s the jokes like this which keeps sexism alive. It’s your funny comment which keeps problems faced by women under wraps or be made trivialized.
You want a men’s day. Go ahead, Have it. I just want to be safe. Promise me there will be no rape. Promise me I won’t be beaten up by my boyfriend or husband. Promise me I won’t be killed in the womb itself, just because I’m a girl. Promise me I won’t be patronized at work because of my gender.
You can’t promise any of this. All you can do is to show me the respect I deserve. So how about you start showing it? Humor is good, humor is fun. But when humor leads to more stereotyping, maybe you need better subjects/topics.
As a woman, I don’t want an International Women’s Day. I don’t want reservations. I don’t want any special treatment. I feel sad that we still need to have it. All I ask is for equality. Ability to lead my life as I choose to. Be treated with respect. Is it really so much to ask?

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I can like Guns and He can like Pink

January 23, 2012 § 2 Comments

It’s common knowledge that I hate stereotypes. And to add credibility to my hate, there are studies which show how often we base our decisions on them (mostly wrong). One of the things I have noticed recently is the Gender Stereotyping. Of course, I have been reading about it and have outraged on certain occasions. My reputation for most annoying idealist feminist is not without a reason.
Did you know that each time you tell your child that pink is for girls and boys don’t cry, you create those stereotypes. Not just create them, when you teach your child that liking pink is not right for a boy, You create guilt feelings for life that are associated with a freaking color. Why? Don’t you think there are enough things in life for a child to worry about rather than the thought that somehow liking a color or a toy is wrong.
And to think, the feelings are so ingrained that I once made fun of a teammate for wearing pink shirt. As an adult, shouldn’t I know that it’s just a color and anyone is free to like it? When did girls patent pink and boy patent guns? We don’t even think twice by reinforcing such stereotypes.
We talk about gender equality. But how can we have it if we are still using century old stereotypes. I have always been good at maths. But that’s supposed to be an exception. Why? I think it’s result of education. It was my father’s love of maths that led him to teach me, in turn my being good at it. Yes, some differences are inherent in our biology. But if a boy wants to cry, that’s part of his biology too. When will we learn to treat our kids in the same way? Girls can like Guns and Boys can like Pink without being labeled as abnormal. Let’s take it from there and hope real equality follows.

So who are you today?

November 28, 2011 § 4 Comments

Sometimes I forget which stereotype I’m playing. There are so many.
At work, I’m the Indian Girl. With some Indian people, I’m the North-Indian Girl. With North-Indians, I’m the Delhi Girl.
At Uni, I’m the IT girl. At IT dept, I’m the Psych Girl.
With some acquaintances, I’m the Snob. With some friends, I’m the out-of-control girl.
Fun fact is I’m probably all of those and yet none of those.

You cannot define me by a stereotype that got passed down by some ignorant schmuck. You will have to make an effort and get to know me before trying to fit me in a box.
It’s possible I might use some similar stereotype. Remind me of my mistake. Fascinate me. Make me get to know you. Be it a boy or girl.
Make people get to know you. Get to know people. Most of us are fun. (And if somehow you are in the bracket that I ignore, either I am unaware of it or you are just not fun)

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