Long Due Post

October 31, 2012 § Leave a comment

It’s been a while since I last blogged. It’s not that I didn’t want to blog all this while. I have all these posts sitting in the draft folder that never saw light of the day. 

So what have I been up to? 

I went to Tasmania in June. I visited family in India in June/July. I’m going to Japan in December.

I’ve more than enough responsibilities at work. I don’t understand why people want to get in the management. It’s just pain in ass. Keeping track of what other people are doing just gives you less time to do what you want to do. Anyway, Work’s been ok.

I might be failing this semester, or not. Exams next week, if I get time to study… Ah well. Never mind. It’s still fun though.

I’ve moved out on my own. While it’s lonelier, it’s also more fun. I like my new place. I get to decorate it the way I want. It’s fun. 

Overall, it’s a good life. There are still people who are really annoying. But then again, what can we do about them except to shoot them, maybe?


Sharing Happiness

February 27, 2012 § 2 Comments

Have you noticed how we always share our woes and pain, but rarely the happiness? (Ok, I *do* that). So I thought why not post when I’m relatively happy (Ok, nauseatingly).
I’ve been feeling better since last weekend. Been off the anxiety pills. Yay for me. Clearly Board games were a good influence and yes, that weekend was lot of fun and much-needed.
In the past week, I
– Saw Alain de Botton. So awesome. Another author to fan over.
– Went to 4 different places in one night. Yes, I’m young again.
– Went to Wine and Paella tasting at a winery. If it wasn’t for the heat, it would’ve been a highlight of the month. But free Sangria bottle more or less makes up for it.
– Slept for 12 hours. Beat that.
– Finished reading 5 books and saw so much TV.
– Met some awesome people.
– Also met old friends. And have started a new tradition with 2 friends that we’ll definitely do monthly lunch/coffee if nothing else.
– Not to mention, No hangover after whole night of G&T. I’m never drinking anything else again.

Clearly, my happy mood brings happy situations and happy people in my life. Uni starts from tomorrow. So excited about that. Will start stressing about essays and lab reports from next week.

Lies and more lies

February 13, 2012 § Leave a comment

She waited for him fiddling with her dress, practicing the words in her head. Today is the day she will tell him. He arrived, happy to see her, ready to take her away from everyone. She tried to get words out, But his kiss wouldn’t let her. Defeated, with a sigh, she slid in to the car seat. She listened to him talk about his work day. She nodded and agreed at the right points. They reached the destination. He had decided to show her the town. Doesn’t matter if she has seen it before.
He took her to lunch, followed by her favorite desserts. She kept that smile on her face. They walked on the beach. Hand in hand. His arms engulfed her. She felt like a cheat.
From a balcony above, a guy stared at her. She moved to another corner. Those eyes still followed her. They pierced her soul and knew the game she was playing. He knew her lies and he could see through the fake smile. She ignored him and smiled at the man on her arm. He leaned in for a kiss. She let him. And then just like that, she couldn’t take it anymore. “Take me home”, she pleaded. Puzzled, he complied.
Through the way back, she babbled unable to forget those eyes. And just like that, they were home. She cursed herself for not saying the words. She had practiced enough, after all.
She went inside. “I have a headache. I’m going to bed now.” “Ok. I’ll be there in few minutes”

Being positive for a change

February 11, 2012 § 2 Comments

I lie in this bed, sick again. I look at my life and wonder if I made wrong choice somewhere. So many people tell me that I did, but I can’t get myself to believe them. That must mean I’m doing it right, no?
I know I should be upset about ex, being alone and somewhat friendless, pressures of work and studies, being broke all the time. But I don’t feel upset. Is there something wrong with me? I saw valentine episode of grey’s anatomy and all I feel is sappy happy. I still believe everything happens for a reason and while I have my down days, I cannot be pessimist all the time. Oh sure, I curse life every now and then (ok more than now and then). But I know I’ll find my rainbow at the end. Whether it’s a white picket fenced house or a shack at some beach, it’ll happen in its own time.
I guess it’s hard to accept that people can be content even things seem tough. And it’s not so tough anyway, unless you count unable to buy books at every whim or call your friend at 1 in night because you want to have ice-cream.
So maybe it’s the medication or maybe it’s my grown up genes or just this burning temperature, I don’t feel sad. I might in another 2 days, but not today.

Ps: ‘dream on’ is playing on my laptop right now.. Coincidence?

PPS: I want to call a certain ex and tell him he was wrong, my decision to go for psych wasn’t wrong. So he can fuck off. Being too mean??

Older, but not Wiser

December 19, 2011 § Leave a comment

Another year gone by. And what a year it was. From Heartbreaks to life changes, it had everything in it. I live such a soap-opera life.
Here’s a recap:
– I moved to a new continent.
– I’m back in school.
– Boy broke my heart. yet again. And in million pieces. You would think by now I will be wiser to it.
– Personal crisis in family. We are still coming to terms with it.
– Knee problem is finally diagnosed. And while I go through the pain each week, It does mean less ankle/leg mishaps in long run.
– I now have an enviable collection of OPI nail paints. (One girlie point has to be there)
– I also belong to apple slave category now. Phone, Laptop, iPod – yup they got me. One shiny gadget at a time.

And to top it all, few hours before my birthday I met Neil Gaiman. He not only signed my books and let me have a pic with him, he also liked my T-shirt and wrote Happy Birthday on one book. How awesome is that?

I’m still in fangirl heaven and it’s been 2 days :))

There were disappointments, of course. But I think at the start of new year, I’ll just ignore them or forget them if I can.

Here’s to me. Hopefully, one day I’ll be wiser.

Regrets or not?

September 6, 2010 § 2 Comments

I recently read a post about someone wondering about why people say no regrets when they are bound to be some in each life. Got me thinking. What do we really mean by ‘No regrets’? As humans, we make choices every day, some right and some wrong. So why ‘No regrets’?
Here’s my interpretation –
Regret means (via dictionary)A sense of loss and longing for someone or something gone. Or A feeling of disappointment or distress about something that one wishes could be different.
But as it is with lots of words and phrases, we all have devised our own understanding. My personal understanding includes the part about ‘distress something that one wishes could be different’. For me, if anyone gives me a choice of not repeating the mistakes I made, I would (in all probability) repeat them. Why, you say? Why not? Each time you do something, you do it with a reason. It’s later when you define it as a mistake or not. And each such choice help you shape your life the way it is today. Yes, I like the illusion of perfect life. It would be nice to have. But would I really be happy there? And who’s to say the other choice would have been better one.
To answer, whether your life is with Regrets or not, Look at your current life. Are you happy? Do you feel overall satisfied? (Ok, we are not counting the raise you can use or the bigger car/house you can buy) Would you swap places with someone else?
If your answers to first questions is No or to last one is ‘yes’. Yes, you have regrets in your life. Saying otherwise won’t change anything.
But if you answer otherwise. Then, Welcome to the Club of ‘No Regrets’

Of course, you might disagree. But overall, if you look around, People with regrets are the ones disappointed with their current lives. They just don’t want to be somewhere else, they want most of their lives changed. And frankly, I don’t think they would be happy with new life as well. As I keep repeating ‘No one can make you happy, but yourself.’
The ones who like their current life are the ones saying ‘no regrets’. Of course, there are always things that you want or wish for. But would I really give up my current life, I don’t think so. Do I want to change myself as a person? Except for few tweaks** here and there, No. I’m happy being who I am. And each mistake I committed contributed in my being the person you see today. Where would I be, had I not learned from those lessons?
So, happily and with pride, I say my life is without Regrets.

**Biggest tweak I want in myself is to be more tolerant of people around -dumb/selfish/mean/just about everyone (yes, it includes the bitch as well).

Rule of Life

May 27, 2010 § 2 Comments

She looked at me with wishful eyes. It was the car, I think, that she wished for. Makes sense. For she was walking in sun, while I sat comfortably inside A/C car.
You think she noticed my wishful eyes? For I looked at her in same way. It’s that baby bump that I wish for. And someone who’ll hold my hand and walk beside me in sun.
Would she trade? Her life with mine?
I think not. Or maybe she would.

Rule of Life. Nobody gets what they want.

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